Podcast Episode: Healing, Power, And Self-Reclamation

Pip: Mare Martell writes like someone who has decided, very firmly, that shrinking is for wool sweaters.

Mara: Today we're covering two territories that turn out to be the same conversation from different angles — what it looks like to take up space on your own terms, and what it sounds like to refuse to give that space back under pressure.

Pip: Let's start with the case for expansion.

Self-Expression And Taking Up Space

Mara: The question both posts in this segment are circling is deceptively simple: what happened to the version of you that had no rules about how much room she was allowed to occupy?

Pip: Take up Space answers that directly. Here is the line that does the most work: "You were meant to be loud; to take up the space stolen from you by those who fear your wealth of experience and wisdom."

Mara: And the consequence is right there in the next sentence — words like old, crone, bitch get reframed not as insults but as tools of containment. The post is saying the vocabulary used against you was engineered to keep you small.

Pip: Which is a fairly efficient piece of social criticism dressed up as a pep talk.

Mara: Retrieve the Wild Woman traces how that containment gets installed in the first place. It maps the stages — girlhood, tweens, dating age, marriage — as a sequence of rule changes, each one narrowing what's permitted. By adulthood, the post argues, the Wild Woman is still there, just floating along behind, staring at the mud puddles.

Pip: The mud puddle as existential metaphor is doing a lot of heavy lifting, and honestly it earns it.

Mara: The post also cites a National Science Foundation figure — that people average over fifty thousand thoughts a day — to make the point that even ten thoughts about you amounts to 0.02 percent of someone's mental real estate. The worry about what others think costs you far more than it costs them.

Pip: So the math of self-consciousness is terrible and you should stop doing it.

Mara: That's essentially the argument, yes. Both posts land on permission — not permission granted by anyone else, but the kind you extend to yourself. Which is where the next segment picks up, because permission is a different thing entirely when it's being actively withheld.

Survivor Healing And Resistance

Mara: NO MORE is a poem written for a Clothesline Project event at a domestic violence crisis center, and it names its targets plainly from the first line — not victims, but the systems and people that tolerate violence and silence survivors.

Pip: The poem earns its title by repeating it as a refrain that builds. Here is the turn where it shifts from apology to declaration: "I won't lay prostate on the canvas and beg forgiveness for a sin I didn't commit but HE did. No. I won't do that. No More!"

Mara: What that shift means in practice is a formal refusal of the guilt transfer — the mechanism by which survivors get prosecuted in the court of public opinion while perpetrators get released back into the world. The poem names that directly: "while you sat in judgment of MY actions and MY life, He repeated his offensive on a sister and a wife."

Pip: That is not metaphor. That is a documented pattern described in plain verse.

Mara: The poem moves through several registers — grief, fury, irony — but it ends in collective voice. It closes by expanding from "I am one woman and I count" outward to "We are women whose light cannot be dimmed," building to a call-and-response that was clearly written to be spoken aloud in a room full of people who needed to hear it together.

Pip: There is a difference between a poem you read and a poem that is asking you to stand up while you read it. This one is the second kind.

Mara: And it connects back to everything the first segment was building toward — the Wild Woman who was told to step around the puddle, the woman told to stay small, eventually finding a voice loud enough to say the words that matter.


Pip: Taking up space and refusing to give it back — those turn out to be the same act at different moments in the same life.

Mara: Next time, we'll see what other territory that life covers.

I’m an animal!

I started out as a Mare

A pirate loudly aging

But I soon became an otter

Clinging to my people

Handle to handle

I turned into a fish

Overturned yellow tube

This was unintentional 

I scaled rocks 

Ducking under a sunken branch

Finally back on my trusty steed

I was a floater

Landing in dead pools 

With big rocks and shallow water

Butt’s up was flowing over

Rapids that jostled rapidly 

Happily lapping at the shore

Without good position,

I transmogrified into a T-Rex

Short little arms no water could reach

Neither could any feet 

I magically became a turtle

Floundering on my back

Finally in the flow again,

Mostly sunny haint blue skies with

Partly cloudy wispy white

Lava-floe sun shrieking hotly

A hawk and a turkey buzzard

Circle the sky at different altitudes 

I think out loud, “Ah, what a metaphor for my life.”

Chaos ensued, shenanigans had,

I laughed at myself in genuine mirth

I essentially stuttered downstream 

One challenge to the next victory 

How deeply grateful am I to learn

How I move in the depths 

And handle the shallows 

Ending up beached; engineering solutions 

As I concluded the journey 

I reverted and emerged, once again, Mare, but better for the experience.

HNBR: Day 6

As we prepare to conclude our vacation, there is much that I need to chaw on for a while. Here are some highlights:

My Aunt Lizzy is one of the most beautiful women I know. Fresh from caring for her yard, she lives up to her shirt.

I couldn’t love this picture or I might explode.

This was our last hug before we left. What a treat to be with those hearts!

This naughty lady, bedecked in a pride collar and a satisfied expression had to be wrangled back into her home after taking advantage of friendly greetings and an open door. Ruby is a good girl.

My dad is on his front porch doing dad things.

My mom doing her thing.

Pegs and Jokers was introduced by my Aunt Helen and Uncle Lou a couple years back to my Rents. My mom and dad raved about it sharing how much fun they had. I got it for them for Christmas the same year. Tonight was the inaugural playing. My dad won.

Very intense concentration
Switched to Yahtzee! Old school box with the rules still in it. My dad got a Yahtzee, but Jen wiped the floor with all of us ending up with THREE Yahtzees!
She is the champion!
Dad came in at #2
Mom was a close #3

And then…

Last cow home.

8am comes a return to our regularly scheduled programming. This has been incredible. Lots of information to digest and process before I can sort through this beautiful, wonderful, farted up life. Bless this holy water..

HNBR: Part 2 of Day 4

Our horse team were Benny and Charlotte. Jamie was our driver. She is a full time resident as of 2020.
This is the stable where the horses are cared for. During the warm months there are roughly 225 horses on the island. In the winter months, about 25 stay year round. The majority go back to the mainland and further north than the island. One horse we met named Barry is going to Europe at the end of the season.
This is a church made of stone. So sayeth the sign. Fun fact incoming:
The windows in this church are imported Tiffany glass worth a buttload of $$$. They are now covered in plexiglass because some idiot built a golf course abutting the church property.
Lilacs were everywhere and the scent was ethereal. When you passed each bush it was a step into an immersive nature experience.
Just outside the butterfly conservatory.
The cairn behind us was in a flower garden.
I was commanded by Libbie Landers to stop and smell the flowers. Photo proof I did just that.
Jen did the same thing.
Chicken 🐓
Chicken! 🐓
CHICKEN! 🐓
Wings of Mackinac
Lilacs and tulips 🌷

Next up is our venture into a fluttering haven of lovely.

HNBR: Part I of Day 4

Our ferry company of choice.
At the dock waiting to board the ferry.
Our ferry is about to arrive at our dock.
This is the very faint outline of the 9:30am ferry heading to the island.
It was cold enough for me to buy gloves first thing. This was our front view.
As we neared the island, The Grand Hotel came into view. The boat ride was choppy so not the easiest to capture it.
This is a snapshot of popular attractions.

This is the first stop we made with a bathroom conveniently nearby. Next post will show you more of the day. Jen said today wasn’t boring.

Bob’s backyard

Just after shooting this video, a goldfinch joined the party. A red-bellied woodpecker also came to enjoy the offering of black oil seed.

Bob returned home after 6 months of being gone. He’s in such a good mood I had to scrape him off the ceiling with a spatula. My Beastie and I moved everything out of his apartment and back to his house.

Mocha enjoyed a pup cup today with deep passion.

It was all over her face.

In other news, last year I asked to do an art installation in the local park frequented by people who walk, run, stroll, etc. on the paths. The city said no, they don’t allow any kind of signs along that pathway in the park.

I sent them samples of the signs I wanted to place. Like “If you’re here, you’re awesome!” “You’re amazing!” “Keep going, you’ve got this!” “You are loved.” But they still said no. That irritated me enough that I made and gave out over 300 1” buttons that said, “Be L❤️ve”.

Although that sated my thirst for a bit, I wondered if I was thinking too small. Turns out, I was!

As part of the Stewardship drive at my church, anyone who pledged for the year got:

I didn’t have permission to post this person’s picture so I disguised 🥸 them. But the SIGNS!

I designed them with a bit of editing and encouragement from my Bestie (Jen Stark suggested Live Joy) and input from Lóre Stevens (Create). Now, those signs will be all over my city all because I was told No. HA! Each one a stake of rebellion and I’m bursting with joy!

You can order here

Death Conference

I get hyper-excited about a lot of things. I love chickens, Kawphy, my sainthood friends, my church, etc. But, getting excited about death? Yup. That’s also me.

My saint of a bestie Jen woke me up at 4:20 this morning. I was setting my alarm before going to sleep, couldn’t figure out what I wanted to wake up to, plugged up my phone assured that my alarm would go off. Only it didn’t because I didn’t save it. Yes, you can eye roll.

My brain was on backwards so I hope I didn’t forget to pack any essentials. I was mostly ready minus chargers and my laptop.

I’m currently sitting in the Knoxville airport awaiting a flight to Chicago. Then, off to Seattle. After catching an Uber to my hotel (a block away from the conference location), I’m going to rest, breathe, and ground myself.

I’ve booked a haunted walking tour for tonight which was recommended by Jordan from Calamity’s Coffee. I’ll catch you up as things unfold.

It’s a great day to be alive!

Just Shy

Not a shrinking violet

Or scared to use her voice

Like a maestro with an instrument

She delivered courageous joy

Dire situations didn’t daunt her

A guidon in a hurricane

although the grim did haunt her

Fear forgot her name

Fishing

I entered the Anderson County Fair this with a wood art piece I call “Fishing”. Today I got news!

Fishing

Last year, I entered this piece made of paper and embellishments:

Durga

My confidence is accepting myself.