24

Wishing you back to life
Grief holds you hostage

I wait for the dirge to play its sobbing notes of sorrow

I wish away the grief that I don’t want to swallow

And yet I’ll sit with you; your body hollow

Wishing you back to life.

I wail to the moon and stars my gypsy heart defective

My fists beat my chest; no longer your keeper protective

sending morose squalls of melancholic reflective

Wishing you back to life.

The Traveling Heart

My soul was lost, floundering without purpose

Gypsy feet wandered human nature

The Sedona Red Rocks of Arizona

Showed me the intense beauty of desert isolation

Reflecting my sun glared eyes

Sunburned skin – husk of an old life shed

Revelation of the raw and openly scored spirit

My feet turned towards the forest loam

I walk deeply, mindfully, into the Ponderosa stand,

Dripping regrets onto needles that violate

My feet and legs, creating a tenderness

That feels like Christmas morning

I climbed mountains to witness the freedom

Of flight

But found the rocks resistant to my wings

Forbidding me entrance;

With courage forged in the fires of trauma

I ascended.

Flinging myself into the swirl of eddies

That couldn’t hold me

I plummeted into the icy, unforgiving river

Where I forded from embankment to water’s edge

Directionally challenged as I

I fight against the rushing waters

Until I’m exhausted and finally relent

To the inevitable flash flood of grief

It washes me onto the shores

Of the roiling ocean waves

Under a full moon gleaming

In sacred silence

I left immediate footprints of ideas,

Beliefs, and yet more solitude of a different depth

The winds of change hurricaned me east

Lessons abandoned, like me,

At the foot of the Great Smokey Mountains

Phoenix-like, I refused my ashes

Reconstituting in my power

Hear me, my friends, those who feel outside

Those who feel forgotten or invisible,

Those who feel created to endure tribulations

Those who arrive precisely on time

Into my company: exhausted, panting, sweating

Sopping in voracious victory

With reciprocal love we bond

Dancing with wild abandon

Intermingling

Pressing our heartbeats together

In loving embraces

With you I’ve found my way home.

Happy Nude Rear!

Here we are at the arbitrary starting line

wrinkling our noses, squinting our eyes

trying to make sense out of life, we vow

temporary compliance with high hopes

and even higher expectations

grasping desperately to achieve the loftiest intention

until we realize, change happens, regardless;

only with work can it be the change we want

He Don't Need Me

I stepped into the heat

of that Arizona sun

looking towards the future

that I’d thought had begun

I wrapped into his arms

on the day that I arrived

warmth and love and laughter

I finally felt alive

But when he sleeps

his dreams are not of me

When he smiles

he shines, but not for me

Through his eyes

my heart, he doesn’t see

I tried to give

But he dont’ need me

Giving up a lifetime

he promised he held the key

Leaving Arizona

a bus to Tennessee

Miles spread out behind me

He’s the best I’d ever known

Making painful choices

Hating loving alone

Cause when he sleeps

his dreams are not of me

When he smiles

he shines, but not for me

Through his eyes

my heart, he doesn’t see

I tried to give

but he don’t need me

No he don’t need me

He don’t need me