Monthly Archives: September 2015

Pearls=Wisdom

Unrefined wisdom

Unrefined wisdom

Oh, how I longed for a string of pearls

I wished and hoped since I was a little girl

I dreamed someday they’d be boon to me

Yoked around my neck as an adulthood key

Offered with adoration from generational knee

For as a foolish child, I believed wisdom to be free.

A-Cross Borne

As I released her hand, my heart bled tears of peace

As I released her hand, my heart bled tears of peace

She once was my holiest of Saviors

begging my life of me as a personal favor

when that night sailed away with the moon.

If not for the promise I gave her

from my ugliest desperate behavior

I’d have deserted the weeping stars too soon.

Now the full moon rises stark

bringing forth what won from dark

as the stars witness my release

I emancipate her hand, relinquish her heart

Another path taken on this journey I embark

To her I offer a blessing of light, love and peace

Polka Dot Salmon (Fish Ladder Blues)

Fishing the Grand River

I was born in your arms

cradled but not protected

shunned, rejected, refused

a starving babe to river’s teat.

I cried colic at your shores;

survived despite your abuse.

Like a battered lover, I, escaped

ONLY

to believe your honeyed promises

to desire your rushing waters

to climb above my station against odds

to find my true love begetting fruition

to linger too long where love dies

I avoided your calls

I dodged your temptations

I surpassed any lack you created

I became, am becoming; power

Infuse me at my request

with the Grand Rapids river’s ravishing rush

pour your shores to return my blood

reunite my spirit with yours

Let’s embrace intimately

passionate with endearing lust

so we may fall in love, again

on my terms.

Wealthy Street

I was a beggar on Wealthy Street

where I was accused of being vibrant

arrested in my quest for murdered time

charged with being an artist

convicted of faith in more than I do

as an accessory after the top hat

In my sidewalk cell,

I became an advocate as a willing-faced pauper

begging for change on Wealthy Street

A Letter to Those Affected By My Anxiety

I’ve had several major life changes in the last few months that have rocked my stability. I didn’t know what a panic attack actually felt like until a friend of mine defined a melt down I had over a number that just felt wrong (a new phone number for me).

I have since discovered that I have situational anxiety (Job loss, loss of home, loss of volunteer positions, removal from my church, relocating 600 miles away back into my ‘Rents house (I’m 47), all this took place in less than a week. Yeah, situational anxiety.

Reading this has really helped me to understand, not only what I have been going through, but what many of my friends who have GAD go through. I found this to be a valuable tool to put into practice while helping my friend through a particularly bad time. I love them and want to do right by them as they do by me.

Fostering for Families

photo

Let me start by clarifying something. When I refer to my “anxiety”, I am not simply talking about my fears or situations that make me nervous. I’m not talking about the kind of anxiousness that everyone experiences throughout their life. I am talking about Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD)- a mental condition which affects nearly every aspect of my life in one way or another.

You’ve probably noticed my nervous behaviors. Bailing on plans at the last minute, making excuses to stay at home, chewed nails, sudden crying, shortness of breath, restlessness, fearing new situations, inability to go to places alone.  Panic attacks.

I try to hide my struggling, but I know you see it. You see it because you care. And because you care, you often try to help. You tell me to take deep breaths. You tell me to calm down, or to stop worrying. With good intentions, you…

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Opinion: Rev. Morrill addresses ‘Black Lives Matter’

This past July, a church committee requested a new message on the electronic sign, which faces the Oak Ridge Turnpike. The message they requested was “Black Lives Matter.” The board of the Oak Ridge Unitarian Universalist Church, or ORUUC, voted to approve it, and the message was added to the sign’s series of scrolling messages.

Source: Opinion: Rev. Morrill addresses ‘Black Lives Matter’

Commemoration

It seems so long ago since yesterday

when you grabbed your toast,

shined your sunshine smile through the clouds

and scooted out the door because you were late.

I followed you, halting at the doorway

You dropped your toast on the sidewalk

You cussed, waved, shouted “I love you”

got in your car and vanished.

I didn’t have police officers showing up at my door.

I didn’t have alarms screaming

I sat on the back porch watching the sunrise

with a hot cup of coffee in my hand

your words warming my heart.

“Hey, doesn’t he work at the Towers?”

called the neighbor over the fence.

I didn’t even realize they’d been talking to me.

“What? Oh, yes.”

“Why aren’t you watching the news?”

I didn’t understand. I thought it odd.

I waved with a friendly wrist making my way to

nothing

Cold pillow. Cold toast. Crystal blue sky.

gone

Gutting of commerce, ashes of hope, lost

It’s years later and it still seems so long ago since yesterday

But I’ve never forgotten your last words to me

Every morning I walk out to lay toast on the sidewalk

Every morning I sit on the back porch and drink coffee

Every morning I watch the news

Everything a sacrament commemorating your unintentional sacrifice.