You don’t need permission to be angry with God
You’re not less of a human or any more flawed
It’s okay to yell, to scream, and to shake
To groan under your burden while your heart aches
To feel like you’re in it, totally alone
The weariness digging down deep in your bones
You don’t need permission to question your faith
To want something different than the cards that have played
You’re perfectly normal to deny what is true
The mistakes that were made that you can’t undo
Rejecting condolences because then “IT” is real
Bargaining, begging, willing to make deals
Wherever your God is, whatever the face
Know that you’re held in comfort and grace
The shoulders you cry on, the prayers that are offered
Are all given up to the ultimate Author
Tag Archives: spirit
TAMP: Honorarium

From the forest comes the howl
Loam of earth’s dead rise
Ascending lift of sacred fowl
Imminent his demise
The snort of buck calls to a doe
A blue jay alarms the wood
Hastened river onward flows
The frigid dusk holds good.
A witness to the story
He is silent in the still
Accolades and glory
Abandoned from his will
His legacy is found abiding
In maple, in walnut, or oak
His spirit freely residing
Among his beloved folk.
From the forest comes the howl
Loam of nature’s rise
Ascending lift of sacred fowl
The undertaking of goodbyes.
The Heir
You were a human being
With a life as precious as my own
But, I’m alive and you are not
To me a path was shown
I’ve inherited your voices
I’m heir to your bright beacon
I will not turn away
My resolve will never weaken
I spend my inheritance freely
With loud pride from your source
I magnify it ideally
Your oppression no longer enforced
The lynching tree will bear no fruit
The crucifixion of branches
Will decay, not take root
It’s time to play with matches
Altar Building
Holy light ripples from one prayer to the next
Candle to candle
Continuous Hope lit liberally
From one heart to another
A sustainable support
To ease burdens
To celebrate joys
To guide one another
With wisdom and reverence
A catalyst towards Universal Love
Progress towards Justice
A beacon towards personal truth
A stable trust in sacred communion
Of torchbearing faith outwardly
Reflection of our own hearts
Rising like the morning mist in a meadow
Day four continues…
After over a two hour delay and having arrived at the stop unwittingly four hours in advance, I’m on my way to Caen, Normandie, France.
There is a bathroom on the bus but it is full and can’t be used. The wi-fi works but doesn’t connect to the internet. 🙄
If you asked me if I’ve been upset at the ridiculous amount of delays so far on this trip, I’d have to be honest and tell you no. Each step of the way, I’ve found reasons to be joyful, comfortable in my uncertainty.
Lost? No problem. How can I solve this issue? Google maps has been a lifesaver. Language barrier? No sweat. Pull out Google translate. Uncertain of what to do for activities? Airbnb has excellent suggestions. Not sure what’s nearby to eat? UberEats was surprisingly easy to use in Paris.
Although I have questioned my navigation skills, I’m still arriving exactly when I need to be somewhere. I’m okay. This is an extraordinary experience. I’m just as glad for the bumpy bits as well as the smooth sailing.



Call me foolish, or call me an idiot, but the woman on the left is my new friend Marie France. I saw her ID, no kidding. She and I, along with several other people waited for the same bus to arrive. Each time we’d see a bus, we’d collectively get excited then collectively disappointed.
We talked about what we do for a living and what our passions are, which as you can well guess, death and dying came up. It was a great discussion. Marie bought us all water and refused to accept anything in return. When the bus arrived, we sat in our assigned seats which was sadly not near each other.
However, when we got off the bus in Caen, she asked how I was going to get where I was going. I explained about the tram and the walk from the stop to where I’m staying. She pish-poshed me and told me nonsense. She would drive me home.
Without even thinking about it, I accepted. The picture I took of her is after I told her to give me her beautiful. She laughed out loud and got bashful. She works as a greeter at the hospital in the second picture, but there is rumor they’re going to eliminate the position. She’s not worried though. She said she’ll find something else in the office environment.
Her gray car had suicide doors! She hustled about clearing the front seat for me to ride since my luggage and hers took up the back seat. I practically live in my car too. I reassured her, she was not alone.
At that moment, I thought about human trafficking and freaking A if I didn’t scare myself a bit with that, but it was all okay. She not only made sure I got where I was going and that I was able to get in. The Farside had a cartoon:
I got the keys, no problem. I got the code right, no problem. The door has a handle which looks like a pull, so that is what I kept doing. Marie, on the other hand, pushed the door open while I, you guessed it, FACEPALM.
She made sure I got into the first floor (second floor in America) apartment. We hugged and she left to go to her own well deserved bed.
I’m sorry I forgot to include this in the original post. It was an invaluable time with a very special person I feel fortunate to have met. She was impressive with her speaking of several languages as natural as a native born. Wherever you are, Bless you for being you, Marie France.
Day Four so far…



The wheel on my brand new luggage suffered the same fate as my first bag. And man do the French love their steps! I walked down two flights of about 30 steps each to access the correct train. What goes down must go up which made me lift my 50lb suitcase and my 20lb carryon up about 40 steps. Many people helped me with them which was surprising and helpful.
Traveling lesson learned, make sure you have sturdy all-terrain wheels on your luggage. You don’t need everything you think you will. Pack lighter than you think.
More to come…
Day Three
I’m having a hard time believing this is real. I’m really in Paris!






Navigating the public transportation has proven to be a challenge, but I found my way back to where I’m staying and most of the way to my meet-up.
The trains are clean and mostly not too crowded. The stops are lit in LEDs so you know where you are. Although I couldn’t figure out how to get on the train at first, I was helped by a tall security guard.
When I got lost, I lost trust in my navigation skills a bit, but, I got to see additional things because of my lack of knowledge. All in all, today has been a win so far.

Day two







The first plane was broken so they brought a second one on the 13th of September but that one got hit by lightning after most of us were boarded which blew out communications. American Airlines put us up in hotels overnight and scheduled the flight for 3pm on the 14th. We got delayed yet again by windshield issues. Finally took off around 4:15pm!
Day One
Complications happened that delayed my plans. Mechanical issues then a replacement plane followed by a lightning strike that took out communications on the new plane.
I got to stay in a nice hotel with a delicious breakfast and even better company. I ate with a young Parisian woman named Hannah who is a journalist returning to her hometown.
I’m okay with this adventure. The Dude abides.

Sometimes Maybe
Sometimes I want to be a kite
Ripped and tugged by wind’s whim
Rising above spectators
Admired for my brightly colored dips
That write nonsensical whispers
Of promises made to a forever not witnessed
Sometimes I wish I were a bear
Raw with raking power paws
With heavy duty claws that help me eat
People I don’t like or those who disturb me.
Sometimes I wish I were a siren
One that rests on rocks singing sweetly
Lulling sailors to their doom upon my rocks
Jutting breasts and flirty hair calling to boys
“Beware! Beware!”
Sometimes I’m glad to be me
A chubby tubby funny woman with dimple cheeks
Cracking open frozen hearts, not of ice
But stuck in places not so nice
Places that don’t remember their worth
Burying their beings without much mirth.



