Tag Archives: review

WORST HOLIDAY ALBUM EVER!

[DARK HUMOR ALERT]

As we enter the holiday season, there’s a new album that’s dropped and it’s AWFUL! I don’t think I’ve ever heard anything worse than this. Whatever you do, don’t listen to any of it. You’ll instantly regret it. The Hits keep coming.

At The Speed of What The Farts (Radio Edit)
Winter GTFO

  1. Dead Starter Blues
    a. Sample Lyric: “Gonna take everything in my account, have to empty that dog out.”
  2. Dying Dog (Euthenasia)
    a. Sample Lyric: “She’s thirteen years old and blind as a bat, she can’t hear her name and she’s fading fast.”
  3. Bed Bug Boogie
    a. Sample Lyric: “I got welty itch from my head to my toes, that’s how the bedbug boogie goes.”
  4. Bitterness and Regret
    a. Sample Lyric: “The ailing heart showed up at my door, catheterized on the hospital floor.”
  5. Monkey on His Back
    a. Sample Lyric: “All my cash went up my nose, what I have left is my dirty clothes.”
  6. So Many Leftovers, Nothing to Eat
    a. Sample Lyric: “I’ve had so much corn chowder it waves hello, and warms up again for another go.”
  7. Delerium
    a. Sample Lyric: “Nine days have taken their toll on his brain. He now sounds like he’s not sane.”
  8. The Boot
    a. Sample Lyric: “Broken foot, faulty hip, growing old can kiss my grits.”
  9. Never Ending Gray
    a. Sample Lyric: “My love, the sun has gone away, I hope to see it again someday.”
  10. The Darkest Christmas Tree
    a. Sample Lyric: “This tree will never win awards until I find the farting extension cords.”
  11. Presence
    a. Sample Lyric: “Stuffs wrapped and under the tree, wondering who is there for me.”
  12. Shitty Ditty
    a. Sample Lyric: “Waking up in the middle of the night, discovering my fart took liquid flight.”
  13. (BONUS TRACK) Cold Friends
    a. Sample Lyric: “They used to laugh and joke a lot, but now they’re in a wooden box.”
  14. AUTHOR’S NOTES:
    This is written in originally Comic Sans for the simple reason that it’s an awful font. Everything on this “album” has happened during the past month to me or to my Bestie.

Charlie Mackesy

This has nothing to do with Japanese Death Poems, even though it kinda does. I’ve made it into a have-to which means I’m commitment shy. I want to read them. I nearly made it through the introduction but found Charlie Mackesy instead at a client’s home.

The Boy, the Mole, the Fox and the Horse was sitting on the coffee table. It has a sketch picture on the front which is what caught my eye. The rough edged raw that showed beauty in loose lines with suggestive coloring. The inside cover filled with music that rippled in waves of tones coming off the printed paper. I was pulled in by simplicity in paradox.

It looks as if the print in the book were carefully calligraphied to demonstrate a deep caring sense of connection to the reader. Although there were parts (like the author’s name) where I had trouble discerning letters (Where’s my glasses?), the words were crafted with care.

“Life is difficult but you are loved.” Simple truth brought to life in a tale of loving friendship in a makeshift family. I identified with wanting to belong, seeking other odd creatures, befriending them in the way family could be, and walking them home. What a deeply sensitive place to balance; on the edge of tenderness.

Dive into the depths of light-hearted conversations rich with wisdom. This made my heart deeply happy.