Category Archives: Ridiculousness

TRIGGER WARNING: The Only Sane Person In The Room

You were the only sane person in the room that day in Earl’s basement in November of that year. You were the one I clung to as my savior because even Janet, his wife and sole witness, rejected the truth before her eyes that Ron committed against my nine year old body.

I escaped through the portal into the apartment that Mork shared with Mindy. I thought of you, Robin Williams, the way you brought that alien to life. You sheltered me from the horrors that happened to me that day. You allowed me a place to recluse myself so that I witnessed what happened to me from a distance. That the pain was unfettered was too much to bear and you, without knowing it, were there with me. You stood by me in rainbow colored be-pinned suspenders and danced around the Colorado apartment. You protected me. Mindy didn’t matter as much as you did, dear Mork. She wasn’t strong enough of a personality to shield me from personal tragedy like you even though she was there too.

I can’t thank you enough for what you did for me that day in the basement unbeknownst to you. If it hadn’t been for the character you brought to life, ironically, I would have emotionally shattered. I only wish that I could have returned the favor to you. I only wish I could have eased the hurt, sadness, and tragedy that haunted your life.

My beloved friend, that I didn’t know in person, I will treasure your gift to the world as if you made it just for me, because that day…that one day, you did.

Dude, your pants are too small

On white people it's called plumber's crack

On white people it’s called plumber’s crack

If a white man had not done it, there would be no attention to it. It was fine and dandy when it was just “those” people. It wasn’t an issue either when it was with “those” people, weed and the old west gunslingers with AK-47’s. Eminem said, he wasn’t wrong, that it wasn’t a problem until it hit middle America in reference to the epidemic of drugs, but add in a tiny addition that includes fashion trends, particularly I’m referring to sagging.

Although I do not personally wear it and I’m not fond of how it looks, that’s a petty thing to pass a law against like they did in the backwards one horse town of Pikeville, TN. What a waste of time, taxpayer’s dollars, and a reversion to the 1950’s ideals of what “those” people are allowed to wear, be, do, and where “those” people are allowed to roam (but not after dark).

This is not difficult. If you’re going to get all outraged and up at arms, why not try being upset that your neighbor is without food? Or a job? Or comfort? Why not be upset about abuse, rape, people with drug addiction, homelessness? What? Oh. Those don’t affect you directly, so we can ignore that. Besides, “those” people need to be kept in their place, bless their hearts. Nobody taught them manners or propriety because we all know that’s our job as the good KKKrischins we are.

Walk down the street nearly anywhere and suddenly the biggest problem you have is someone’s clothing? Not the Veteran on the sidewalk with a cardboard sign that dives for cover any time a car backfires? Not the woman with her children huddled next to her on a park bench where they clearly live? Not the neighbor who sits alone without company because nobody visits?

What in HELL is wrong with you? Pull that plank from your eye. Use your eyes to see a problem. Use your mind to find the solution. Use your hands in the name of your God to improve the world. I’m not claiming to be perfect. I’m not claiming to be better than anyone else. I want that clear. I’m not throwing any stones. I’m holding up a mirror.

P.S. Although I’m using the term “those” people, I do not wish to have this taken out of the context it is intended. This is meant as a mirror towards people who think skin color is something to use a divider between who can and who can’t do something.

The Hokey Pokey

Benjamin James, as per our agreement. 1,000 pokes gets the hokey pokey done Mare Martell style!
If you like it or love it, please share. If you don’t like it, share it anyways so you can take turns mocking me. However, be it known, that a week ago, I couldn’t have danced this due to just having had foot surgery. WOOT!

#becauseisaidiwould